Dear Reader,
I seem to be stuck in 1999 which is aways back. But it’s true. My favorite comfort shows are Friends and Frasier. My favorite book series is Harry Potter. I regularly think of memories from that time as a young woman coming into my own. *sigh* such, nostalgia for days long by and that young woman is gone, gone and turns out she was a bit delulu, bless her. But this eccentric old lady I am becoming is fun to kick it with. It’s a truth that every version we are on our life’s journey is beautiful and a small miracle. I can still remember being 10 years old and loving teddy bears and horses with my whole heart. I still love teddy bears and horses.
I was able to get out my watercolors this week and make a go of it. I bought a nice flat brush and was able to create a flat wash in lemon yellow – perfectly, for the first time ever. I finally realize how important it is to choose the right brush for that job and to create enough paint on stand-by to keep the momentum going.
Isn’t it funny though how as we get older, we have all this experience to pull from? When I sit down to really learn something again, I always find that it comes a lot easier than I had recalled. And in my social life, when I need to disregard information, I am getting in interactions with random people, I can do so (finally!) with little mental resistance – like the work has already been done – so I can go ahead and cut to the end and drop other people’s neuroses. It is this unflappable attitude I used to observe in the old women of my formative years. I had apparently snap-shot those micro expressions of indifference and it’s a power I pull from now. Life is funny weird that way.
However, Randy and I are not enjoying the aches and pains of our 5th decade. My husband broke a tooth yesterday just minding his business eating a nacho! What an awful surprise. Doesn’t that shit just ruin your life in a second? And I’m feeling the arthuritis creepin on me fingers as the weather gets cold. Get thee behind me Satan, I got alchemical shit to do.
And this is to be filed under confessions from the heart: I love these newborn baby dolls. Like there is a whole world of women crafting baby dolls and using every technique imaginable to make them look like the real thing. And I want one. And the baby doll website is a just a rabbit hole of cuteness. If I were a rich lady living a life of leisure, I would probably make an entire nursery just for the feel goods. As it is I just won’t let myself buy a baby doll. I haven’t yet reached that level of eccentricity. But I aim to get there.
Especially these silicone baby dolls. They are so lifelike it’s spooky. Reborn Art Dolls.
